The Coffee Shop Stalker – Part 6

The Rose and Thorn
A short story by Jason Youngman – Part 6

Jonathan receives a text from Mini asking if he would like to join her for a drink at the Rose and Thorn, which is a singles bar in the downtown area of Halifax. He writes back saying that he’s busy correcting papers. A few seconds pass and another text appears from her: You’ll like my girlfriend. Jonathan is curious but what does she look like. Could you send me her facebook profile? A moment later a picture of Priscilla appears in his inbox. What are the chances! On second thought I’ll be there in 30 minutes.

Priscilla’s facebook is filled with beautiful images of herself, most of them taken with very little clothing. There’s one photo of her pretending to give head to a life size statue of a moose on the side of the highway. Her wall is plastered with quotes by Carl Jung, a Swiss psychiatrist and the founder of analytical psychology. One quote in particular stands out: In sterquiliniis invenitur. Jonathan thinks to himself that it’s most likely Latin for something really deep and profound. He decides to keep it as a conversational piece. Perhaps he’ll be playful with the quote and pretend that it really means something else.

The Rose and Thorn is filled with single women alright, but Priscilla stands out above the noise. She and Mini are drinking Malbec; a red wine imported from Argentina and very high in antioxidants. The women are allowed to drink for free so Jonathan is rather happy not to have to buy drinks for them. He enters the establishment as though it’s his first time, stands at the bar and orders a large glass of water. The bartender sizes him up before he tells him to be a good boy. That’s the last thing on my mind Jonathan replies. They both chuckle and turn away from one another. Jonathan scans the entire room for potential enemies. Thankfully the coast is clear, so he approaches the women who appear to be caught up in blissful gossip.

Here he comes says Mini. Let’s pretend that we don’t notice him. Hello ladies, you won’t believe what just happened to me on the way down here. Jonathan has told this story a few times before and tries to change the details to make it more interesting to himself. “There was a couple, a man and woman, walking hand in hand along the harbour attacked by a dog, and the guy actually hid behind her…” Mini interrupts, “Right O! Then the couple break up. You told this one already in class last semester.”

Jonathan has a strong urge to play with his hair but reaches his hand out to Priscilla instead. She gracefully extends hers with the palm facing down. He gently clasps it with his middle finger pressed slightly firmer into the centre arch of the palm, while his thumb remains lightly lodged on the back of her hand. He bends towards her while keeping eye contact, pausing for a moment before his lips reach their destination. His kiss soft and warm upon her Aloe vera scented skin nearly puts her into a state of ecstasy.

“Priscilla, this is Jonathan. Jonathan, this is Priscilla,” declared Mini in her most formal voice. The lights are dimmed and the bartender plays ‘I Will Always Love You’ by Whitney Houston.

“Mini has told me all about you,” said Priscilla, “but I believe she’s leaving out the bad stuff.”

Jonathan feels perplexed. He’s not prepared for such an opening but is careful not to veer too far from her inquiry. “Well now, I can assure you that I’m not going to lure you back to my bedroom if that’s what you mean.”

The comeback is strong, yet witty, Priscilla thinks to herself, and comes up with another question to see just how refined he might be. “Now what would be so bad about that,” the last word in her sentence is stressed, indicating that it’s a question within a question. It’s a subtle form of communication she picked up over the years while speaking with eggheads at U of T.

Jonathan doesn’t want to walk on egg shells with her, so he smoothly changes the direction of the conversion. “Under my pillow there’s a feather. Any who dare to enter my bed will be tickled until the morning light.”

Priscilla can’t help herself from laughing but doesn’t want to interrupt his flow. “What kind of feather is it,” she implored.

“It’s the kind that tickles,” Jonathan’s come back is too dry for Priscilla, but he picks up on it and recovers himself by saying, “if you mean where does the feather come from, then I might say it was plucked from a big bird.”

“As in Big Bird from Sesame Street?” she jested.

“Maybe,” countered Jonathan, “that would certainly explain why it is yellow.” Her laughter nearly matches Whitney Houston’s high pitch in the chorus part of the song that continues to play in the background.

Jonathan soaks the experience in. He knows that he has won her affection, and a good first impression can bring much ease and momentum to a conversation. Unfortunately a couple of hippies he has had his way with enters the front door, so he darts for the washroom in hopes of not being seen.

About Philosopher Muse

An explorer of volition and soul, a song under a night sky and a dream that forever yearns to be.
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1 Response to The Coffee Shop Stalker – Part 6

  1. Anna says:

    “Jonathan thinks to himself that it’s most likely Latin for something really deep and profound……!!!” HA HA HA

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