“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” – Viktor E. Frankl
What do you do? Where are you from? What college did you graduate from? What was your concentration? Are you married? How much money is in your bank account as we speak? Her barrage of questions nail you down into a pigeonhole without wings to escape, so you decide to make light of things by making up the most absurd answers on the spot.
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I am the CEO of Victoria Secret and have graduated top in my class from the University of Forever and a Half specializing in synthetic G-Strings. Your inquisitor turns into a giddy admirer. That’s a strange name for a school she adds. It’s called Forever and Half because that’s how long it took me to graduate from it.
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There’s another option we could employ without resorting to witty deception; one that requires a balance between courage and consideration. We possess the power to turn what appears to be a negative into a positive. By diplomatically removing the sting of cynicism from our social interactions, we can open the floor for more ease of expression. Allow me to demonstrate:
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So what do you enjoy doing with your time? What are some highlighting features of your hometown? What would help to make the college you attended a more edifying place to be? What career would you like to pursue if you were financially independent and how would you go about making improvements?
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The alterations made to the original line of questioning allows for more flexibility between the stimulus and response. By simply rephrasing the other person’s questions, so that they allow more room for growth and adaptation, we can expand the veins that keep our hearts warm with affection.
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This proactive approach to modifying what might ordinarily be a banal probing of sorts, can become an enriched and soulful conversation should the occasion call for it. With a little imagination, circumspection and heart, it’s possible to resuscitate and transform a trite interaction into a dialogue imbued with exuberance.
Great advice and example of how almost any human endeavor lends itself to creativity, and possibly inspiration for others.
Indeed, creativity allows for growth, change and win/win agreements without getting fixated on rules that no longer serve the greater good.
The title of this post is very poetic, full of meaning 🙂
Thank you! It’s amazing how 5 little words can become so much. There’s a power in simplicity that makes the heart shine with vibrancy.
I work with college students as an academic counselor in my day job. One question I often see in our field is, “What do you want to do after graduation?” It’s supposed to help them develop their college pathway. The problem is it falls prey to Hick’s Law: Too many choices and you can’t make a choice. I read somewhere several years ago that instead of asking “what do you want to do,” it is better to ask questions like, “what problems do you want to solve,” “where would you like to travel or what people would you like to meet,” or even “what types of books or shows interest you.” These probe for deeper meaning outside of simply doing.
I hear ya. The quest is in the question after all. 😉